Well weddings are their own beast. They have their own subsets of rules, which are full of their own inconsistencies. Issues come up with them that dont occur with anywhere else in society. To use an example that will bring this conversation full circle: Miss Manners once had to tell a lady who was to be a "Best Man" that it was wrong of the Groom to insist that she cross dress for the occasion :-)
I can say this though -- the societal norms are full of double standards that piss me off. The people on the short end of the sticks can react in two different ways when it comes to pushing for consistency:
1) Assert their "right" to do whatever the other guys are "allowed" to do.
2) Assert no "right" whatsoever until such time that the other guys youre dealing with assert theirs. Then follow suit in kind to whatever extent they do.
My problem with #1 is that the "short end" person does this based upon what he/she PERCEIVES the rules to be. If the "long end" person he/she is asserting *at* didn't have the same perception of the rules, (or more likely, no thought out conception of the rules) at best then the message will be lost, and at worst, it's polarizing someone against you who wasn't before.
#1 also smacks of chip on shoulder. I don't know anyone who was ever swayed by such a tactic. #2 may make people think just a little, which I assume is the goal.
(no subject)
I can say this though -- the societal norms are full of double standards that piss me off. The people on the short end of the sticks can react in two different ways when it comes to pushing for consistency:
1) Assert their "right" to do whatever the other guys are "allowed" to do.
2) Assert no "right" whatsoever until such time that the other guys youre dealing with assert theirs. Then follow suit in kind to whatever extent they do.
My problem with #1 is that the "short end" person does this based upon what he/she PERCEIVES the rules to be. If the "long end" person he/she is asserting *at* didn't have the same perception of the rules, (or more likely, no thought out conception of the rules) at best then the message will be lost, and at worst, it's polarizing someone against you who wasn't before.
#1 also smacks of chip on shoulder. I don't know anyone who was ever swayed by such a tactic. #2 may make people think just a little, which I assume is the goal.