![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
"I want one of two things. I want either the
technologically ignorant to remedy their ignorance,
or I want their abject obedience in technical matters.
It really doesn't matter too much which I get."
-- ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif){kind=small}
siderea,
2004-04-16
Moved up in the queue by two months because of
one of xpioti's users yesterday. Happy birthday
to xpioti, by the way! :-)
(no subject)
*merry grin* Thank you muchly! An admirable birthday present. :)
*Giant hugs*
(no subject)
Bring on the techie D/s scenarios!!!
"Obey, you Luddite-slaves!"
Send Siderea an electric riding crop and a violet wand with complete set of attachments..... *evil grin!!*
Ah yes ...
User: "We cannot do what we want with this program!"
Me: "Well, the software you bought without consulting the IT department does not do that."
User: "Can you fix it?"
Me: "Can you logoff your computer so we can do midnight processing?" (yes, this was an OLD machine)
User: "Oops, I have some paperwork I need to get entered today but I forgot it, can you delay the midnight system shutdown?"
Me: (trying to remain serious) "Sorry, no."
User: "Our terminal will not work!"
Me: "Ok, I will come look at it." (Coffee sloshes out of the keyboard when I go look and I notice people put drinks on the ledge next to the terminal)
User: "Honest! We have NO idea how that got in there!"
User: "We have a problem, we let other people use our terminal while we are logged in using it. Why do you not station someone down here full time to stop that security problem?" (My boss took a phone call complaining I did not solve that issue and had to maintain a straight face. :-) )
User: "We want to make this change to the program, can it be done?"
PR person: (trying to look good while knowing nada) "Yes." (then looks to me to back her up with tech-speak)
Me: (knowing the changes it would involve) "Why would you want to do that? It would involve ... " (This earned me the most interesting glare from the PR person :-) )
Re: Ah yes ...
See, that's your problem. I have found nothing so salutary as bursting into hysterical laughter, then stopping abruptly and saying, "Oh, you're serious? I'm terribly sorry, my mistake."
(no subject)
Or just a taser, a car battery and a couple of alligator clips. Not fussy. And it's not like I want anyone to enjoy it.
(no subject)
(no subject)