I wasn't intending to be insulting or narrow-minded; what I was trying to say, obviously not well, is that being in situations that force you to open up your thinking to arrangements you hadn't previously considered leads to acceptance of some of those arrangements, one of which -- for many people -- is the idea that you can "just" be friends with people of the opposite sex.
Most of my friend's relatives are not willfully narrow-minded; it's just that they haven't lived in a diverse multi-cultural multi-sexual society, so to them his having a close friendship with a woman is suspect. (Imagine if he were polyamorous!) I'm not saying they're stupid; they obviously know at some level that such things exist. But there's a difference between knowing something intellectually and being immersed in it.
I don't know if that's any better, but there's my attempt to clarify.
(Oh, and nowhere did I say that being heterosocial is better than being homosocial.)
In understand no ill meaning was mean't. It is just sometimes I tire of the "all things traditional are wrong" attitude I sometimes run in to. I have been in relationships that were not normal before and I am in a open marriage currently.
What I have learned is the the traditional system has a great deal of merit. It give people a good sense of security, and avoids many of the things that can lead to feelings of insecurity. I have seen many a "new" system of relationship fail. (and one or two that were traditional fail). The conclusion I have is that no system is perfect. Each have value and as such none are better. These untraditional relationship introduce all sorts of new risk and problems. SOme I have encountered personnally. Others I have witnessed.
But I have admitted to being conservative and as such I have a natural preferance to the traditional and am more suspect of the new or inventive systems. Even though in some ways I am not following a traditional path.
(no subject)
Most of my friend's relatives are not willfully narrow-minded; it's just that they haven't lived in a diverse multi-cultural multi-sexual society, so to them his having a close friendship with a woman is suspect. (Imagine if he were polyamorous!) I'm not saying they're stupid; they obviously know at some level that such things exist. But there's a difference between knowing something intellectually and being immersed in it.
I don't know if that's any better, but there's my attempt to clarify.
(Oh, and nowhere did I say that being heterosocial is better than being homosocial.)
(no subject)
What I have learned is the the traditional system has a great deal of merit. It give people a good sense of security, and avoids many of the things that can lead to feelings of insecurity. I have seen many a "new" system of relationship fail. (and one or two that were traditional fail). The conclusion I have is that no system is perfect. Each have value and as such none are better. These untraditional relationship introduce all sorts of new risk and problems. SOme I have encountered personnally. Others I have witnessed.
But I have admitted to being conservative and as such I have a natural preferance to the traditional and am more suspect of the new or inventive systems. Even though in some ways I am not following a traditional path.