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I don't watch "reality television" (what's any more "real" aout it than a traditional game show on a soundstage anyhow?), and I don't watch dating shows ... but I was curious what the "twist" was going to be in Average Joe. I figured they'd have to save it for the last third of the show, so I didn't have to sit through much of it to find out ... if I guessed wrong and tuned in too late, no big deal.
Okay, I saw the revelation of the big secret, and the reaction to it ... and I don't get it.
Not only do I fail to identify, I haven't even manage to make sense of it intellectually. Is this something I would understand if I'd seen other episodes of the show? I got the impression it was something "any guy" would automatically understand, but I am utterly baffled. (Though if it really is something nearly universal, it wouldn't be the first thing I don't understand about men.)
[Edit: Added description of the big secret....]
The twist turned out to be her revelation (to the hunk she'd picked, after they were wherever they got flown off to) that her ex-boyfriend was Fabio. And this proved to be so terrible that the hunk wound up rejecting her -- and he looked really shaken up. He said, "Ask any guy and they'll understand what I'm feeling."
Is there something I don't know about Fabio other than his being an uberhunk and a model for cheezy romance novel cover art? Is having a bird break your nose contagious and your lovers carriers? Colour me clueless.
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But my overall reaction can be summed up as "Whatever..." :-)
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Gotta love you for this
*(SNERK!!!)*
I'd say I'm with you on the clueless meter. I wish I could say that the new hunk was turned off at her bad taste and didn't want to be lumped into that category (if only people ever really thought that way....) But my guess is that he's intimidated (and who would know more about guys feeling that way than I?) He's also an idiot.....but then, he's dating ON A GAME SHOW!!!!! So it isn't as if his idiocy is news to us. At least he isn't making government policy.........
More Tim Robbins, less Fabio; make the world a better place......
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Best I can come up with is either an inferiority complex for fear of not measuring up in the muscle department or a fear that she'll expect him to grow his hair long and carry a fan around to make it always blowy.
"Guys"
However, I think you've missed an important distinction -- he said any guy would understand, not any man. I'm not sure exactly what guys are, but I've gotten the idea from the media that they're a certain type of male creature that share strong (perhaps extreme) enthusiasm for sports, and certain attitudes toward women (excuse me, "chicks") and various other characteristics. As far as I can tell, I have never been a guy, so it doesn't trouble me that I fail to understand this particular piece of guy-groupthink.
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M who has never dated anyway enters the minefield of sexual politics
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It comes from the perpetual male insecurity about "measuring up" against other guys. Of course, each of us "measures" differently, so what's obvious to one is mysterious to the other.
What I'm guessing this guy was thinking is this: "My god, she's dated a fscking *celebrity!* Compared to that how am I *ever* going to measure up?! She may like what she sees now, but sooner or later she's going to see that I'm not as good as her Celebrity Lover. Better to bail now than to face the music later... bye!"
Guys have this idea that women are mercenary about sex and relationships; they're holding out for the "best offer". They may like you for now, but if a better offer comes along they'll drop you in a flash. In this case, the hunk feels that she's already *seen* a Really Stupendous Offer. While Hunk may be able to dazzle her for a time, sooner or later he feels that she's going to realize that Fabio was the better offer and go back to him, humiliating Hunk in the process. Better to leave with one's dignity intact now than to face greater humiliation later.
Weird... this is so obvious to me... am I that conventional?
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I agree; the mundane view of What Women Want matches this, and it's always baffled me. Which is why Queer Eye for the Straight Guy baffles me, too; sure, I'd love it if
It's sort of like this
"Woman have left me for real creeps, and *this* woman has
left Fabio for me. Obviously I'm just a stepping-stone, again."
No, that doesn't wash, most typical guys' emotions don't
manage that sort of indirect logic.
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Odd. I haven't ever noticed insecurity in you. Just body-induced annoyance. Odd. I have never considered Fabio attractive. ^shrug^
I probably wouldn't have got the point of the show either, would've got it wrong, or would've wandered off to see whether there were any chips or cookies. A confused semi-guy.
Thumb improves.
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I'm not sure why I was curious either ... mostly that morbid car-crash fascination, wondering what deep secret would be important enough to count.
I do have insecurities. Just not the one explained in other folks' answers here.
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But this discussion gives me pause while I consider why I favour men who are computer geeks, dance, play early or folk music, and wear skirts at least sometimes.
I've either found my groove or got into a rut. Oh wait, it's springish. Forget I said that.
I still can't understand the shoe thing, though. Oh, well.
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A better reason to write off a woman you found out was previously in a relationship with Fabio: she must be shallow to be attracted to such phony perfection and the celebrity status of a Hollywood B-star. This reasoning fails since we have no way of knowing what Fabio is really like. While the odds are that his looks and celebrity status have given him serious problems, he could actually be a sweet and caring guy. It's easier to believe that someone that seems to have it all must really be shallow and stuck up and that anyone in a relationship with them must be equally messed up.
Still, Interesting that Hollywood felt that this revelation would be a shocker. Seems kind of anticlimactic to me.